Single AF

 I'm single and looking.

This is the text part of my Internet dating profile:

Smile! Profile pictures shouldn't be terrifying! If your facial expression looks like a bulldog that just inhaled a box of kitty litter, you're probably not going to get good results here or in life.

I'm not starting over, I'm continuing the journey. I like myself, flaws and all.

Papa. Veteran. Designer. Cancer Survivor. Gadfly. Apprentice Polymath. Advocate. Cynophilist. Stoic. Artist. Ignostic. Minarchist. Autodidact. Pastafarian. Ambivert. Patriot. Contrarian. Bibliophile. Occasional Mensan. Former police officer, sailor, and soldier. INTJ. 

I'm Dave, but my nickname has been Rock since I was a young sailor. Either one works. 

I value honesty, kindness, courtesy, intelligence, integrity, dependability, playfulness, positive attitudes, resilience, empathy, spontaneity, punctuality, great communication, a rowdy sense of humor, an open mind, and common sense. I'd like to believe I bring each of those traits to the table. I am looking for a local lady who has time for a relationship and the inclination to build one with the right person (Me!). I am a night owl, unvaccinated, and an Ignostic Minarchist. 

I've lost 115 pounds and enjoy recreational cycling and the gym.

Life is a mosaic. I have many varied interests. Some are phases and others are enduring. Family, dogs, laughter, reading, music, bicycles, movies, playing the ukulele, singing, graphic design, fitness, health, yoga, walks, flea markets, window shopping, travel, Stoicism, improv, photography, Mensa, Rubik's Cube, blogging, advocacy, people watching, meandering. I started Spartanburg Ukuleles (Ukulele Club) in late 2018 and I'm enjoying my mediocre progress immensely. My musical tastes are extremely eclectic. 

Your mother was a hamster and your father smells of elderberries. Go away before I taunt you a second time. 

We have to be attracted to each other, but I care more about your heart and character than your looks, job, income, home, or possessions. I'm not materialistic and prefer to be comfortable rather than GQ or Better Homes and Gardens. I could honestly not care less what the Joneses are up to. 

I share my home with my two rescue dogs; Girly and Darnell. They're family. 

As I am looking for someone with the potential to form a happy, long-term relationship, I prefer to meet someone in or neighboring Spartanburg County.

We could be the best thing to ever happen to each other, but unless we talk and meet, neither of us will ever know. Please send me a message, not a Like, if you're genuinely interested.

Fattitude No More

 Fattitude No More 

(Fattitude 2003)

1996               2020                  Dec. 2021

As a young man, I was ten feet tall and bulletproof, or so I thought. Life has a way of catching up with us and sometimes bringing us to our knees in ways the Navy and Army never did for me. I developed bulging disks, Degenerative Disk Disease, Heart disease, a host of urological issues, Fibromyalgia, chronic kidney stones, arthritis, depression, Chronic Fatigue Syndrome, Carpal Tunnel Syndrome, Neuropathy, and chronic pain. I went from being a very physical and active 180-pound man, often riding a bicycle thirty plus miles a day and playing volleyball three or four evenings a week, to weighing 327 pounds, having had a heart attack, heart stents, and over three dozen surgeries, Yo-yo dieting, depressed, lethargic, and in chronic pain, and feeling like there was no way out. I locked onto the Vicious Circle Argument that I couldn't get fit because of all of my pain and issues and I couldn't reduce all of my pain and issues because I wasn't fit. Sadly, this is not uncommon.

In the midst of COVID-19, I felt I'd had enough. I had lost thirty pounds by starting smoking again and stalled there. I had used the free version of the My Fitness Pal app to lose seventy pounds before, but gained it all back and more when I quit using it. I was tired of feeling like my health was nickel and diming me to death and I was just waiting around in storage for the relief of a permanent dirt nap. I took stock of my life and the things I had to be grateful for and to look forward to and decided it was worth the effort as was I. I know plenty of morbidly obese people who live active lifestyles and that doesn't guarantee fitness. "Weight is lost in the kitchen, not the gym."

If you don't control your caloric intake, little else makes a significant lasting difference. I resumed using the free version of the My Fitness Pal app, only this time it wasn't a diet, it was an investment in myself and my family and a healthy lifestyle change. With the app, which you download onto your smartphone, you enter your age, height, weight, goal weight, and how much weight you want to lose a week. It then tells you how many calories a day you have. You can "earn" more by entering any exercising you do. It is essentially following a budget. It will give you suggestions on fat and sugar content and more, but it is your choice which, if any, to follow.

A banana is about thirty cents and a hundred and ten calories versus a Snickers bar that is about a buck and a half and 250 calories. The banana is healthier, more filling, and doesn't have the sugar crash a candy bar does. A half-pound of imitation crab legs (Pollak and other fish) is 220 calories, sweet, has no prep out of the package other than plating it, and it takes a while to eat and is thus more physically and psychologically filling.

I joined a local health club called Inman Health and Fitness. I've gotten where I hate working out just to work out, especially by myself, but they had an Over Fifties Class two days a week and Yoga on Fridays. This gave me socialization, support, cardio, increased muscle tone, flexibility, and a strong progress gauge. It helped me look and feel better. I went from 3XL T-shirts to Large or XL, from 3XL gym shorts to Large, and from a 48' waist to having 36' shorts falling off. I had a lot of support from the class and the gym owner, Gary Painter, who is a great guy and a specimen for any age.

I got where I rarely overeat and quickly learned to prepare for dining events that made tracking my intake difficult due to having no nutrition guides. I tend to eat less beforehand and guesstimate conservatively in those scenarios when making my entries. When you eat until you feel stuffed, your stomach stretches. A half hour or so later it shrinks and leaves you feeling famished and feral. I've learned to avoid this as much as possible and actually enjoy eating more.

After losing the weight, I continued to have several health issues including failure to heal from previous surgeries and was diagnosed with cancer and my activity level had to drop significantly as I had more surgeries with some serious downtime. I've kept the weight off, but look forward to returning to classes and riding my new Trek hybrid bicycle as the weather improves. I couldn't ride a bicycle to the end of my driveway before due to my weight making my knees feel like they'd explode.

I'm 57 years old now and I am here to say that you can teach an old dog new tricks and it's not over until it's over! 

Memento Vivere! (Remember that you must live!)

Iman Health & Fitness Over 50 Class May 2021

Visions of Generalizations

When I look I rarely see you, I see history. Not your history, but the cumulative acquired experiences and perceptions of my lifetime. Tattoos? Your poor parents! A Bible? Oh God, don't get me started! A middle-aged dude in a 'Vette? BWA HA HA HA HA HA! Brown skin, pink skin, yellow skin, black skin, who did who in the what with a huh in the here?

As we do so, we recognize patterns and lean on them rather than having to rediscover each concept every time we want a Klondike Bar or a slug of Pepto Bismal. Expediency counts and generalizations make it easier.

While passing through The Now (rather than being in it), we paint pictures and tell stories in our heads to give meaning and warnings if needed and to retain our momentum; the last time you made that face, wore that dress, had that twinkle in your eye, scowled like my grandmother... nice legs, close-set eyes, big flabby meat wings, grimy fingernails, shiny watch, mesh-back truckers' hat, overbite, bed head, designer label, big tiny penis truck, luxury automobile, screaming kids, Trumper sticker, Biden decal, dirty feet, extra-humungous Yoga pants, everything we see we judge. It is an intrinsic survival skill of human beings; The Law of Generalizations. It kept us safe as we evolved. It continues to do so, but it also keeps us fearful, arrogant, and isolated. We don't really see too often, at least not with the eyes of a child, the wonder of a new heart, or a truly open mind. Plato said, "The unexamined life is not worth living."


"It's a flower."

"Yes, but tell me about this flower."


Prejudice is Generalization's ugly cousin.

generalize

[ jen-er-uh-lahyz ]

verb (used with object), gen·er·al·ized, gen·er·al·iz·ing.

to infer (a general principle, trend, etc.) from particular facts, statistics, or the like.

to infer or form (a general principle, opinion, conclusion, etc.) from only a few facts, examples, or the like.

to give a general rather than a specific or special character or form to.

to make general; bring into general use or knowledge.

verb (used without object), gen·er·al·ized, gen·er·al·iz·ing.

to form general principles, opinions, etc.

to deal, think, or speak in generalities.

to make general inferences.

https://www.dictionary.com/browse/generalize

Generalization is the foundation of learning. It builds great wisdom and entrenches ponderous ignorance. We have to comprehend a hundred gazillion things to be able to even conceive, for instance, leaving a room, such as;

self

room

in

out

enter

exit

motion

rising

walking

reaching

twisting

pushing

pulling

door

doorknob

etc

ad nauseum


Remember: No generalization is worth a damn, including this one.

"Ohm"

#generalizations #visions 

Shibby Dibby Dow Bow Mow Mow Mow (Mayo Rap)

I Guess That's Why They Call It The Blues ukulele cover by Nefarious Rock

Why I Will Not Deliberately #BuyBlack on this Black Friday, Facebook.

Facebook had the above ad on my newsfeed on October 30, 2020. I found it disturbing. I've have a facebook account since 2008 to keep up with family, friends, and business acquaintances, and to share common interests. We do not need Social Media taking on the roles of Big Brother and The Nanny State. When you seek special treatment for any group of people it is done at the expense of every person not contained in that group. It is the opposite of equality. Many small businesses have closed their doors permanently due to the pandemic and gross government overreach. When I heard that Goorin Brothers Hat Company, America's oldest hat manufacturer, which was founded in 1868, had closed eleven of their twenty-seven neighborhood shops I was saddened by the loss of jobs, communities, opportunities, and another piece of Americana gone. I didn't think it was sad that White jobs, Black jobs, Hispanic jobs, or any other kind of race jobs or businesses were lost. We need to learn to embrace what makes people unique, rather than fear or distrust it.

Yes, Black Lives do matter. No, I will not support a business just because it is owned or not owned by people of any race, religion, color, creed, gender, sexual preference or identity, or national origin. I patronize businesses on my interest in their goods or services, recommendations, perceived value, and past experience. I do make an extra effort to give small local businesses my business if they are reasonably competitive because I like supporting my community and neighbors. I don't worry about anyone's race, color, nationality, etc when I do so.

All lives matter. The Black Lives Matter movement has not only been hijacked by Socialists, but it has also inflamed America, built hatred and distrust, and severely set back race relations in the once Land of the Free. The people behind the organization are blatantly evil. Their agenda does not include the betterment of people of color no matter what their words say. They are dividing America.

I once read that racism was when someone was denied trial treatment or rights solely based on their race and that racialism was whenever someone doesn't get things their way then they blame it on racism. In an age of political correction and Newspeak racialism had become rampant and actually contributes to creating more racism.

The brilliant Black economist, Thomas Sowell talks about race hustlers like Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson, Jr who make everything about race. Sowell wrote an incredible piece called Black Rednecks and White Liberals. It's well worth reading and contained in a book of essays by the same name.

We have forgotten how to not only think about others but how to be responsible for our own happiness and well-being. It is not the government, Hollywood, or social media's place or duty to do either. We need to take back our future by walking in love, taking personal responsibility, and building communities. How many people reading this know most of their neighbors, have a diverse mixture of friends, and volunteer outside of the home?

I challenge you to spend one fourth of the recreational time you spend online including social media, for the next month, volunteering at two or more local groups outside of your church or normal functions. Meet some new people, make some friends, expand your horizons, experience paradigm shifts, be a better, bigger person, grow, and see if the world doesn't become a better place. Walk in love.


#BigBrotherAndThenannyState #facebook #BuyBlack #kowulz #ACunningLinguist #RockCowles #StopTheHate #walkinlove #ThomasSowell #BlackRednecksAndWhiteLiberals #Socialists #Orwellian

I Have Fat.

 

I'm not fat. I have fat. It's not me, it's extra me. It's not who or what I am. It doesn't define me. It doesn't show you my heart, my history, my intelligence, my kindness, integrity, compassion, sense of humor, courage, adventurousness, creativity, or the love that I have for people or that people have for me.

It doesn't tell you how it got there, what it has cost me, or who I may have been before it came to be. It's just there. It's not healthy. It's rarely fashionable. It takes a lot of energy and it still takes its toll on the rest of me. I don't embrace it, but I accept it. It doesn't define me.

I may have lost hundreds of pounds over my life through hard work, perseverance, and sacrifice, but they never put that on my pants size. I may be eating healthier than anyone you know and exercising several hours a day and if all you see is fat, you'll never see who I am or who I may become. 

Chubby face, meat wings, pudgy thighs, loose skin, beer belly, muffin top, wide load, cankles; swipe left. Not seen and yet gone. It's amazing and often disheartening that as big as I am, so few people can see me. Really see me beyond the blinders of social judgment. I didn't start off with fat. Few people do. Few people make a conscious decision to pack on the pounds or even double or triple their body weight as adults. Sometimes it is poor choices. Other times its circumstances, nurturing, genetics, accidents, injuries, emotional issues, disease, or other health problems. We hate Adipocytes, also known as lipocytes and fat cells, but without them, each and every one of us would die.

It's still socially acceptable to mock, ridicule, and condemn the obese so long as you don't do it at work or school. I've never heard anyone proclaim "Fat Lives Matter!". For that, I'm glad.  I'm not fat. I have fat. It's not me, it's extra me. It's not who or what I am. It doesn't define me. 

Brother, can you spare a fat cell?

#RockCowles #ACunningLinguist #Kowulz #Fattitude #fat #IHaveFat #FatLivesMatter